Mission Accomplished

Well, ladies and germs, it's official - I may just make the best damn guacamole ever, or at least the best my friend the nonbeliever has ever had.  She liked it so much that she pretty much ate the whole bowl (it was only one avocado - don't judge!)  Anyway - my recipe is super simple, so give it a shot and tell me what you think.  And before you read it - yes, I know - there's no cilantro in it!  Add it if you wish, but I'm not a big fan of cilantro - shocking...

My Super Tasty Guacamole Recipe
You will need...
- One avocado
- 1/4 of a small onion (yellow or white), minced
- 1/4 roma tomato, seeded and finely diced
- 1 jalapeno (or to you taste) seeded and minced
- dash of lime juice (or lemon if it's handy)
- salt to taste

1. So, prep your onion, tomato, and jalapeno and put them in a bowl large enough to use a potato masher in. (Nope, kids, not using a blender for this guac - it's better with a little texture, and frankly, I like the fact that I can tell that there are chunks of avocado in it, not just mystery green goo...)
2. Next, get the avocado out of its skin:  super easy - just take a chef's knife and cut around the avocado on the long axis - basically just hack you knife in once, and then move the avocado, not the knife, until you get a cut around the whole thing.  Then, twist the two sides that you've cut and voila - you're almost done.  Now, tap the blade of you knife into the seed of the avocado, firmly enough to make the knife stick, then twist your knife and the seed will come out.  Get rid of the seed, and scoop out the flesh of the avocado with a spoon.  Dice it - about a 1/2 to 1/4 of an inch will work.
3. Now, add your avocado to the veggies in your bowl, sprinkle with you citrus juice of choice, and mash with a potato masher (or wooden spoon.)  Now don't go crazy with the mashing - think texture and presentation - not mush the crap out of it!
4. Once your desired consistency is reached, season with salt and enjoy.

My recipe is extremely basic, and written for the novice chef, so if you're frustated after reading this - bite me.